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Like a nervous heart that is crazy beating.
i'm proud to be who i am, i don't need your approval. immitation; the most sincere form of flattery, although if you do attempt to rip my codes, copy my pictures, claim credit for anything i made, you're going down. welcome to my site, hate me? look for that little red cross on the top of your browser, and click.
[disclaimer-]
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i can't be who you are
time out if everyone's worth pleasing
im caitlin, an average teenager who likes to live my life. i'm 14.5 years old, and i believe in god. no, i'm not crazy, i'm just faithful. i love music, and i'm a proud fan of rihanna, christina aguilera, panic! at the disco, the red jumpsuit apparatus and more. i love to meet new people, so shout out at my tagboard and i'll be glad to talk to you.
Name: Caitlin
Age: 14
Orientation: Straight
Gender: Female
Birthday: May 27th
Zodiac Sign: Gemini
Languages: English
Location: Australia
Education: High School Student, Grade 9.
Ethnicity: Caucasian/White
Job: Babysitting
Television: Scrubs, Friends, Two and a half men, So You Think You Can Dance, The Biggest Loser, The Simpsons
Movies: Anything with Jim Carey, Jennifer Aniston, Ashley Tisdale etc.
Music: Ashley Tisdale, Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, Rihanna, Eisley, Fall Out Boy, Panic! At the Disco, The Veronicas, Chris Brown, Shiny Toy Guns, Britney Spears
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friends
rosa huiyi kangling charissa may lin qing dawn cherie miko louise lizzie claire nina
credits
layout: (supervillain)
codings: inksplash
inspirations: minty-peach
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Tuesday, October 14, 2008 @6:27 PM
online fiasco.
have you ever had an online relationship with someone? whether it be a friend, an enemy, or a lover? i've had all three. trust me, it's not easy. expecially if you know them offline - and you had a past history loving them. i know, i know - kinda stupid of me, falling in love with someone who i only speak to online. he has a choice to speak to me offline, too - i really have all the time in the world. it's just that he doesn't want to. this has been going on for around (prepare yourselves) one whole year. one whole year without talking to me. i recently discovered he was talking about me behind my back. i lost all trust and respect for him, for only a few days.
as soon as he begged me to re-add him on msn, i was weak once again. i lost all my dignity, once again. i cannot believe myself. i am so, so upset and depressed with myself at the moment. and you know what? the sad thing is, deep down i know he's using me. he's using me for so many things. then he wanted me to tell him all my secrets, all my feelings, and i have this small amount of dignity and pride in me now that i told him no. mostly because all i've been feeling was about him. everything.
i've tried to focus my heart and my mind onto someone else, something else, anything at all. really, i can't think of a damn thing that i can say or do that would finish my feelings for him for once and for all. because, and i hate to admit this to myself, i still like him. not as much as before, but just a little bit. and, now his friends are joining in with him, talking to me offline too. except for the person me and my friends call mouseboy. he has the funniest teeth, and the curliest hair. he also is quite podgy around the stomach area. although he doesn't know we call him that. we do it secretly. it's just so irritating that he thinks the world of himself.
so, whats the point of boys? really? everyone has different opinions, but i find myself asking, to no one in particular, "why do boys have to be such jerks all the time?" i must keep my feelings inside, i must. if i want to regain the little pride i had in the first place.
sorry for the particularily flat and sad post, i'm just having a crummy day. oh, and welcome to my blog, too.
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